SEMBREAK!

It's that time of the year again...my favorite break second to the Christmas break. Here is where I get to do the things I like doing. WAHOOO. Just like the past sembreaks, this one is about doing household chores, new interests, reading books, playing PlayFirst and Big Fish games and games I can play with the VBA and other emulators, geeky time, watching funny youtube videos, catching up on TV shows, catching up with my high school friends, going out with other friends, having family gatherings, going out of town, sleeping more than 8 hours a day, internet-ing, music-ing (haha), etc.

Although this time, I'd be doing more of fixing up our house because of the recent tropical storm that struck the country, aside from this, there are also new things like reviewing for the National Medical Admission Test (NMAT) and of course my favorite, spending time with the bad boy :)

+ Leng

"They say that good things take time...

...but really great things happen in a blink of an eye."

It makes me laugh reading my last entries and how my life has changed since then.

You never really know what's coming for you. :)

Thank you :)

iTunes effin reads minds

What a way to break my heart and put it back together again.

You're the best listener that I've ever met, you still held your breath and the door for me, thanks for your patience.

:)

Case closed.

Ineffable

It has come to this. For the past weeks I felt like my mind's a whirlwind of thoughts. I'm very much caught up with my academics, my org friends, my block friends, my friends outside the block and of course, me thinking about being in a relationship.

Let me tell you this, I am a very emotional person. I get affected easily. Just this weekend I shed some tears over that The Rock movie where he was a football player who didn't not know he had a kid. I am very mababaw, some of you know how I cried over 27 Dresses. You should really get chick flicks or family movies away from me if you don't want me to cry and hug a pillow or tell you "I love you" or something. Also, I almost cried when we visited our new area for Tugon for the first time yesterday. I still want to cry now just thinking about it. Even though I have been a member of Tugon since first year and I have interacted with abandoned/abused children every week, I still could not stop myself from asking why the hell those beautiful angels were left by their parents. The area visit was particularly hard for me because we can't play with the babies and kids just yet, so when the babies reach out, as much as we want to carry them and make them feel safe, we can't. I'm so excited to go back and be able to hug them.

I am digressing but you get the point. I'm emotional. Also, I like hugs and hugging.

At this point I don't know where this is going.

I just am confused in general. Maybe I have so many things to do, so many friends I would like to hang out with, so many feelings to feel and so little time (Yes, the cliche, it's eww actually). And sometimes, I feel like I am not thinking about what I am doing or my mind's off somewhere or someone. One thing I have learned from Fr. David at this point in the semester is that we don't progress because we don't think about what we do, meaning we don't attend or give our full attention on what we are currently doing. I preacher once said that, "we are where we are because we should be just where we are". There is a reason why we are in some place, with certain people and we should be there. But I have been finding myself thinking of different people and places while being somewhere and with some people.

At this point, I'm just letting things out. I have no thesis statement here.

Nowadays, I always thank God because he gave me many new choices and many new friends. But then, new friends means less time for old friends. And I am very emotional and I miss.

God also gave me many choices on who to like but I am very sad that no one has chosen me or at least reveal the intent to choose me in some way. Oh yeeeeaaahhh. Pokemons, lucky them.

Haay.

And because of this, I want to drink this week.


"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.", Closing Time -Semisonic

I believe I am in the middle of an end and a beginning has yet to make me happy.

Translation (I did not want to sound desperate but here it goes): "Someone please ask me out."

I feel this is a selfish thing but oh well, I'm tired of being selfless.


+ Leng

Love

Oh love, click!

I am happy to tell everyone that I have found this kind of love in the many people I've met (so far) in college...especially in my orgmates in Tugon :)

Of course, I cannot marry each one of them and fully give myself to them. That right only belongs to one person. I just wish that one person would come. The one who would also experience that kind of love through me. Together we shall continue the flow of love to our friends, family, the country (!) and to the whole world.

A love that would make the difference in many people's lives. I like it very much.

Amen.

(Thanks to Pc for the link :))

Itigil ang kaguluhan

Sa nakaraang linggo, dalawang tao galing sa aking sekundaryang pag-aaral ay aking nakita muli. Namiss ko talaga sila pero sa mga pagkakataong ito hindi maiiwasang mapunta ang usapan sa usapang pag-ibig.

Unang-unang, noong Biyernes, ika-29 ng Mayo, sa tapat ng Ministop sa may Katipunan:

Ako: Ms. Lastierre! Ay "Mrs." na pala kayo!
Ms. June Lastierre: LEA!
Ako: Kamusta na kayo Miss? Ilang taon na anak niyo?
Ms. June Lastierre-Agno: 1 year and 3 months (?)! Ikaw kamusta ka na? Ateneo ka pa din?
Ako: Opo!
Ms. June Lastierre-Agno: Anong year ka na ba, second?
Ako: Magtthird year na po.
Ms. June Lastierre-Agno: Gumaganda ka ah! Ano may boyfriend ka na?
Ako: Wala pa po.
Ms. June Lastierre-Agno: Bakit wala pa?

...

Pangalawa, kahapon, Linggo, ika-31 ng Mayo, sa may Leslie's Tagaytay:

Matapos magkakitaan at magkamustahan, napunta din ang usapan sa pagkakaroon ng jowa...

Christina Duhan: Eh ikaw, may boyfriend ka na?
Ako: Wala pa nga eh...
Christina Duhan: Bakit wala pa eh ang ganda ganda mo?!

...

Salamat sa mga papuri pero. Ang natatanging sagot ko lang sa kanilang mga katanungan ay ang pag-aaral. Aral muna... CHE. Sinong niloko mo Leng?

Alam naman nating lahat na gusto mo ng magkaroon ng minamahal.

Pero siyempre, mapili ako...isa lang gusto ko. UY.

Itigil ang kaguluhan.

2:22 am

I just made a wish.

And I prayed.

Prayer works eh?

I remember the first time I prayed so hard that my prayer was answered immediately -- the next day in fact. It was six years ago, imagine how happy I was. But I know this is not the case for every prayer. God would not answer every prayer the next day. This time I know I am more patient. I'm the kind of person who wants something so bad that it ruins my mood because of the frustration it brings about, but I have to learn to wait. It is in waiting that something gains value. I may be afraid that I'd have less chance of being with someone I genuinely like but then I think, "Where was I when he was always around?" and "Why didn't I ate and sat down with him when he asked me to...when I had the chance?" I have many of these questions but I believe God has his time and plans for me.

I guess I had a change of heart. I suddenly saw him in a different light. I don't know why just now. The weekend and long car rides with him (together with other great people) changed me in many ways. The innocent acts of kindness back then now has colors of possibilities that I would like to make myself believe to be true. If they are indeed how I think of them now, I will know it in the right time. Until then I'll wait happily. I'll think of the times I had the absent-minded smile, familiar heart skips and butterflies whenever he's around, chooses to sit beside me, rests his head on my shoulder, orders the same drink as I do or takes me home and stays out to see if I get to our door safely. I'll hold on to these simple little things without expecting but hoping.

"You held your breath and the door for me.", Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette

+ Leng

-----------------------------
May 17, 2009
11:46 pm

Stop the shit.
I have been talking to a couple and asking for opinions about certain stuff related to the entry above. The guy says one thing and the girl says another. I have fallen for the trap for the third time. Oh darn devils of expectations, go away please.

We all know that he's just super kind. Right?

I just wish he would not be so kind, but then, it's why I have come to like him in the first place.

GAH.


"I couldn't help it, it's all your fault.", Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette

-----------------------------
May 19, 2009
10:15 pm


I am so tired, but last week I was also tired like this but I was able to stay up to 2 am. Oh love.

Expect the worst and hope for the best.

Random, I miss my Mama. It was her birthday yesterday and now she's in Davao.


"It's a love story, baby just say 'yes'", Love Story - Taylor Swift (Darn you, Tasie :)))

-----------------------------
May 21, 2009
1:22 am

I am very thankful that I attended the Leadership Talks of Fr. Ben Nebres and Mr. Rene San Andres. At these times, when I badly want something (better yet someone. ew.) and I have many things to do a.k.a. the hell week, it is good to hear some wisdom and reorient myself. I am beginning to be selfish, angry and irritable because of frustration. Thanks to these talks, I was able to go back to the best version of me.

I must remember that the ability to postpone the gratification of a want is essential for one's health.


"So come over, just be patient, and don't worry.", Death And All His Friends -Coldplay