I just made a wish.
And I prayed.
Prayer works eh?
I remember the first time I prayed so hard that my prayer was answered immediately -- the next day in fact. It was six years ago, imagine how happy I was. But I know this is not the case for every prayer. God would not answer every prayer the next day. This time I know I am more patient. I'm the kind of person who wants something so bad that it ruins my mood because of the frustration it brings about, but I have to learn to wait. It is in waiting that something gains value. I may be afraid that I'd have less chance of being with someone I genuinely like but then I think, "Where was I when he was always around?" and "Why didn't I ate and sat down with him when he asked me to...when I had the chance?" I have many of these questions but I believe God has his time and plans for me.
I guess I had a change of heart. I suddenly saw him in a different light. I don't know why just now. The weekend and long car rides with him (together with other great people) changed me in many ways. The innocent acts of kindness back then now has colors of possibilities that I would like to make myself believe to be true. If they are indeed how I think of them now, I will know it in the right time. Until then I'll wait happily. I'll think of the times I had the absent-minded smile, familiar heart skips and butterflies whenever he's around, chooses to sit beside me, rests his head on my shoulder, orders the same drink as I do or takes me home and stays out to see if I get to our door safely. I'll hold on to these simple little things without expecting but hoping.
"You held your breath and the door for me.", Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette
+ Leng
-----------------------------
May 17, 2009
11:46 pm
Stop the shit.
I have been talking to a couple and asking for opinions about certain stuff related to the entry above. The guy says one thing and the girl says another. I have fallen for the trap for the third time. Oh darn devils of expectations, go away please.
We all know that he's just super kind. Right?
I just wish he would not be so kind, but then, it's why I have come to like him in the first place.
GAH.
"I couldn't help it, it's all your fault.", Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette
-----------------------------
May 19, 2009
10:15 pm
I am so tired, but last week I was also tired like this but I was able to stay up to 2 am. Oh love.
Expect the worst and hope for the best.
Random, I miss my Mama. It was her birthday yesterday and now she's in Davao.
"It's a love story, baby just say 'yes'", Love Story - Taylor Swift (Darn you, Tasie :)))
-----------------------------
May 21, 2009
1:22 am
I am very thankful that I attended the Leadership Talks of Fr. Ben Nebres and Mr. Rene San Andres. At these times, when I badly want something (better yet someone. ew.) and I have many things to do a.k.a. the hell week, it is good to hear some wisdom and reorient myself. I am beginning to be selfish, angry and irritable because of frustration. Thanks to these talks, I was able to go back to the best version of me.
I must remember that the ability to postpone the gratification of a want is essential for one's health.
"So come over, just be patient, and don't worry.", Death And All His Friends -Coldplay
And I prayed.
Prayer works eh?
I remember the first time I prayed so hard that my prayer was answered immediately -- the next day in fact. It was six years ago, imagine how happy I was. But I know this is not the case for every prayer. God would not answer every prayer the next day. This time I know I am more patient. I'm the kind of person who wants something so bad that it ruins my mood because of the frustration it brings about, but I have to learn to wait. It is in waiting that something gains value. I may be afraid that I'd have less chance of being with someone I genuinely like but then I think, "Where was I when he was always around?" and "Why didn't I ate and sat down with him when he asked me to...when I had the chance?" I have many of these questions but I believe God has his time and plans for me.
I guess I had a change of heart. I suddenly saw him in a different light. I don't know why just now. The weekend and long car rides with him (together with other great people) changed me in many ways. The innocent acts of kindness back then now has colors of possibilities that I would like to make myself believe to be true. If they are indeed how I think of them now, I will know it in the right time. Until then I'll wait happily. I'll think of the times I had the absent-minded smile, familiar heart skips and butterflies whenever he's around, chooses to sit beside me, rests his head on my shoulder, orders the same drink as I do or takes me home and stays out to see if I get to our door safely. I'll hold on to these simple little things without expecting but hoping.
"You held your breath and the door for me.", Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette
+ Leng
-----------------------------
May 17, 2009
11:46 pm
Stop the shit.
I have been talking to a couple and asking for opinions about certain stuff related to the entry above. The guy says one thing and the girl says another. I have fallen for the trap for the third time. Oh darn devils of expectations, go away please.
We all know that he's just super kind. Right?
I just wish he would not be so kind, but then, it's why I have come to like him in the first place.
GAH.
"I couldn't help it, it's all your fault.", Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette
-----------------------------
May 19, 2009
10:15 pm
I am so tired, but last week I was also tired like this but I was able to stay up to 2 am. Oh love.
Expect the worst and hope for the best.
Random, I miss my Mama. It was her birthday yesterday and now she's in Davao.
"It's a love story, baby just say 'yes'", Love Story - Taylor Swift (Darn you, Tasie :)))
-----------------------------
May 21, 2009
1:22 am
I am very thankful that I attended the Leadership Talks of Fr. Ben Nebres and Mr. Rene San Andres. At these times, when I badly want something (better yet someone. ew.) and I have many things to do a.k.a. the hell week, it is good to hear some wisdom and reorient myself. I am beginning to be selfish, angry and irritable because of frustration. Thanks to these talks, I was able to go back to the best version of me.
I must remember that the ability to postpone the gratification of a want is essential for one's health.
"So come over, just be patient, and don't worry.", Death And All His Friends -Coldplay
4 comments:
marami atang nangyari since nag usap tayo? :P...
we need 2 talk again hahaha. bonding time ulit XD
SAMMYBOY!
Ahahaha. Well, madami ngang nangyari...mostly internal stuff. Walang big things. Ahahaha. Medyo ewan, nakakasabaw.
I need my dose of patience too :((
Nikki! Patience! It is a virtue. :)
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