"It's not you, it's me."
We've all heard this line a lot of times before. I think at this day and age we all know that this is BULLSHIT.
This is the reason used by jerks to break up.
What real nice guys would do is to honestly state why they want to break up. They would have a good and loving intention of pointing out what went wrong in the relationship especially with the other person so that each can grow and learn from the "wrong" things that happened. Jerks on the other hand would focus on themselves as the reason for the break up. They're selfish and mean. "It's not you, it's me." It's like saying "you can't do anything to change this situation because that's just how you are and you don't have the capacity to grow. And I won't let you, because I am ending this in my own terms and I don't want your opinion."
Jerks won't give you the real reasons because they think you can't handle the truth. They think you are weak. They think you can't handle criticism. They think you can't do anything more. And so they cover up the real reasons with sticky, thick, super sweet caramel, dipped in chocolate, dipped in honey, dipped in sugar. And you know what it would taste like? It would taste like one big toothache. It would hurt so much worse than something said honestly.
A real nice guy would say:
1. "You look like you're not trying to look pretty for me anymore."
We could have fixed ourselves up and look like the girl they fell in love with.
2. "I'm getting tired of always being with you. Can we do projects separately?"
We could have done our own thing and maybe because of the time apart, they'd want us like before again.
3. "I think you're making decisions with so much consideration about our relationship and our future together. Please don't do that."
We could have done so, and we could have grown so much more. We could have thanked him for a good wake up call.
4. "I think we're being complacent about things because we know we have each other to accept us as we are, even though we're being mediocre."
We could have had another wake up call to be more driven.
5. "I'd like to practice my charms on other girls and I think I am actually attracted to another girl because she is better that you are right now."
We could have made ourselves so much better for a much better guy who would deserve us.
6. "I'd like to explore some more and have unrestrained, 'no strings attached' sex for the years to come, and I think you're not the kind of girl who would do that."
We could have known all along that he was a jerk from the beginning, and we would clearly know that we deserve a better man.
If they are really nice guys, they would say honest and hurtful things at first with the loving intention of pushing us to become the best person we can be after the break up.
Jerks would choose to say that "nothing is wrong" with us so we won't have the chance to become better.
"It's not you, it's me." = "You don't have the ability to become better in any way. Hanggang diyan ka nalang. Wala ka ng pag-asa"
Jerk. Jerk. Jerk.
+ Leng
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